Starrs Aboard

There are moments in every marriage when you have to pick your battles.

And then there are moments when your husband announces that he has purchased seven black speakers for your white RV ceiling.

This was one of those moments.

I should probably explain something about Ed.

Ed is apparently incapable of living anywhere that doesn’t have surround sound.

You might assume from this that he’s some huge movie buff or music fanatic.

Nope.

But every house we’ve ever owned has had surround sound because Ed has installed it. And apparently, downsizing from a house to an RV does not mean downsizing the surround sound.

So, of course, Starrs Aboard needed surround sound too.

Five speakers in the living area, plus two more in the bedroom.

Seven speakers.

Ed did his research and found exactly what he wanted: Pioneer 6.5-inch, 3-way speakers.

Great speakers.

One small problem.

They were black.

Our ceiling is white.

And there were SEVEN OF THEM.

Ed’s position was simple.

“They’ll look fine.”

My position was equally simple.

“No. They absolutely will not.”

He also informed me that the speakers he wanted didn’t come in white.

Now, I’m not an audio expert. I couldn’t tell you what makes one speaker better than another. Ed, on the other hand, had very specific requirements about watts and three-way coaxial something-or-other.

I had exactly one requirement:

I did not want seven giant black circles on my ceiling.

Apparently, we each have our areas of expertise.

I was so convinced this was going to look ridiculous that I asked ChatGPT to make me a picture showing black speakers in a white RV ceiling compared with white ones.

Yes. I created a visual aid for a marital disagreement.

I stand by this decision.

After seeing my extremely compelling evidence, Ed still wasn’t giving up his speakers.

But he did come up with a solution.

He painted them.

White.

And wouldn’t you know it?

They look fantastic.

Even better, they sound amazing.

A few days ago, I was standing in the kitchen of the RV, which is still parked in our driveway, while Top Gun: Maverick was playing.

A plane went roaring across the screen and I swear I felt like I needed to duck.

So apparently the man knew what he was doing.

And that was going to be the end of this story.

Until I read this post to Ed.

“You should tell them the truth,” he said.

“What truth? That’s exactly what happened.”

Apparently, there was one tiny detail my husband had neglected to mention.

He had already bought the white paint when he bought the speakers.

He was planning to paint them white the entire time.

“WHY DIDN’T YOU TELL ME THAT?”

His answer?

“I wanted to see your reaction. I was just pulling your chain.”

So while I was researching white speakers, arguing my case, and actually having ChatGPT create a visual aid to demonstrate the horror of seven black circles on our ceiling…

Ed already had the paint.

The speakers sound amazing because Ed picked them.

They look amazing because Ed was apparently planning to paint them white all along.

And I spent all that time defending the aesthetic integrity of Starrs Aboard purely for my husband’s entertainment.

Happy Marriage. 😂